Porcusorul Agresiv

Romanul e roman si la birou

2007-03-08T08:33:00.000-08:00

Acesta este un e-mail intern (pentru angajatii romani) , de la reprezentanta romaneasca a unei mari corporatii:

>> > Subject: Improper Language Usage
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > It has been brought to our attention by several
>> >
>> > officials visiting our office in Romania that
>> >
>> > offensive language is commonly used by our
>> >
>> > Romanian speaking staff. Such behavior, in addition to
>> >
>> > violating our policy, is highly unprofessional and
>> >
>> > offensive to both visitors and
>> >
>> > staff. All personnel will immediately adhere to the
>> >
>> > following rules:
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 1. Words like f***, în P*** mea, P*** and other such
>> >
>> > expressions will not be tolerated or used for emphasis
>> >
>> > or dramatic effect, no matter how
>> >
>> > heated a discussion may become.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 2. You will not say si-a bagat P*** when someone makes
>> >
>> > a mistake, or s-a c**** pe el if you see someone being
>> >
>> > reprehended, or baga-mi-as, when a
>> >
>> > major mistake has been made. All forms and derivations
>> >
>> > of the verb a se caca and a se f*** are utterly
>> >
>> > inappropriate and unacceptable in our
>> >
>> > environment.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 3. No project manager, section head or administrator
>> >
>> > under any circumstances will be referred to as P*** de
>> >
>> > om, cacanaru' or boul.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 4. Lack of determination will not be referred to as
>> >
>> > pulalau nor will persons who lack initiative be
>> >
>> > referred to as muiangiu.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 5. Unusual or creative ideas offered by management are
>> >
>> > not to be referred to as porcarii.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 6. Do not say futu-ti mata if somebody is persistent;
>> >
>> > do not add P*** mea, if a colleague is going through a
>> >
>> > difficult situation. Furthermore,
>> >
>> > you must not say am pus-o (refer to item 2) nor o sa
>> >
>> > ne-o traga when a matter becomes excessively
>> >
>> > complicated.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 7. When asking someone to leave you alone, you must
>> >
>> > not say du-te-n P*** mea or should you ever substitute
>> >
>> > "May I help you?" with, ce P*** mea
>> >
>> > vrei?.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 8. Under no circumstances should you ever call your
>> >
>> > elderly industrial partners bosorogi împutiti.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 9. Do not say ia mai mereti-n P*** cu cacatu' asta
>> >
>> > when a relevant project is presented to you, nor
>> >
>> > should you ever answer futu-te-n cur
>> >
>> > when your assistance is required.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 10. You should never call partner representatives as
>> >
>> > boul dracului or tâmpitu' ala.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 11. The sexual behavior of our staff is not to be
>> >
>> > discussed in terms such as pizdulica buna, f***'
>> >
>> > or homalau' lu' peste.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > 12. Last but not least, after reading this note,
>> >
>> > please do not say ma sterg la cur cu textul asta. Just
>> >
>> > keep it clean and dispose of it
>> >
>> > properly.

De 8 martie

2007-03-08T08:14:00.000-08:00

Tactica media

2007-03-08T07:59:00.000-08:00

Mediafax a dat ieri o stire cum ca lui Helciug i s-a furat telefonul mobil, pentru o scurta perioada. Nu am bagat in seama. Am zis ca se plictiseau. Seara, la stirile Pro TV, iarasi subiectul asta, cu lux de amanunte. Concluzia? Pro TV pregateste o emisiune in care va aparea cantaretul cu "Traiasca Berea". Am uitat cum se numea formatia.

Noroc ca voi nu aveti butoane

2007-03-07T09:48:00.000-08:00

Blogul e pentru cei sanatosi

2007-03-06T07:06:00.000-08:00

Astazi nu am scris si nici nu voi scrie nimic pe blog. De fapt, se pare ca scriu acest post. Faptul ca am ajuns la spital cred ca este o scuza suficient de buna. De data asta am scapat. Totusi, bucurati-va de blog cat mai puteti... Nu se stie cat il voi mai putea scrie...:D Viata e scurta.

McBusiness

2007-03-05T07:30:00.000-08:00

Via Cosmin.

Terapie de grup

2007-03-05T06:57:00.000-08:00

Umor involuntar

2007-03-05T06:27:00.000-08:00

In "Tricolorul", "ziarul popular, crestin si european" al lui Vadim scrie ca "NewsIn este, probabil, cea mai partizana si mai ticaloasa Agentie de Presa care a existat vreodata în Romania. Scopul ei nu este informarea, ci dezinformarea opiniei publice...". De asemenea, "Vântu s-a pus in totalitate la dispozitia Matrozului Chior". Materialul a fost cel mai bun lucru pe care l-am citit de multa vreme incoace. Nu cred ca am mai ras vreodata atat citind ceva.

Teo plange de fericire?

2007-03-05T05:53:00.000-08:00

Intr-un interviu din Libertatea, Teo a declarat "Catinca Roman, Raluca Moianu, Andreea Banica, Irina Reisler, Catalin Crisan, Oana Zavoranu (echipa ei de la Romantica). Da, sunt fericita. Aseara i-am vazut pe toti laolalta, intr-o poza de grup. Mi-a venit sa plang". Cred ca daca excludem "da, sunt fericita" ar fi un raspuns mult mai potrivit... Oare de ce a lasat-o pe Oana la sfarsit?

Prima senzatie

2007-03-05T04:03:00.000-08:00

Aseara, am nimerit intamplator la stirile de pe Prima TV. Ce imi aud urechile in mod intamplator? "Gigi Becali ii demite pe Mihai Stoica si pe Cosmin Olaroiu, in urma rezultatelor slabe. Mai multe amanunte la Focus Sport". Nu am mai rezistat pana la Focus, dar toata chestia a fost un fas. Celelalte posturi au inteles ca totul este o gluma si nu au abordat subiectul in niciun fel. Daca nici baietii care miros scandalul de la un kilometru, de la sport, la Pro Tv, nu l-au bagat in seama pe Gigi...

Gluma sau nu, intentionat sau nu, in urma acelui anunt gresit, ar fi trebuit sa cada niste capete la Prima. Altfel, Prima o sa piarda si putinele puncte de rating pe care le atrage, la stiri..